the onion
Furloughed bison pour back into national parks after government reopens
You all know The Onion is satire, right?
Weekend Reader, Sunday Feb. 25
What's this? The leading Congressional Benghazi warrior sets his sights on Scott Pruitt?
Funny things happen to some Congressmen when they consider life after Congress.
Trey Gowdy, the angular South Carolinian who rose to fame with his relentless pursuit of the Benghazi investigation, announced he won't run again in 2018. Gowdy came to Congress in the 2010 election by swamping incumbent Bob Inglis in the primary.
In a year when "primaried" became a verb, a moderate like Inglis—who even spoke up about climate change—had no chance.
A former prosecutor who won the nickname "Bulldog," Gowdy took the lead in pressing the Benghazi investigation—credited (or blamed) with helping defeat Hillary Clinton. His strong conservative credentials seemed perfect for Trumpism.
But last week by Trumpian standards, Congressman Gowdy Benghazi'd up the wrong tree. As chair of the House Oversight Committee, he sent a letter Tuesday to EPA, demanding details on Administrator Scott Pruitt's extensive first class travel, and on the size of his entourage.
Pruitt is said to have pulled field investigators off of protecting the environment and into a head-of-state sized personal security detail. Democrats on a second panel, the House Energy and Commerce Committee, have made a similar request.
Then there's the Cone of Silence. Pruitt reportedly spent $25,000 to install a private phone booth for conversations.
This week, another facet of Pruitt's leadership turned up. In an interview with the Christian Broadcasting Network, Pruitt offered a spiritual angle to his drill-baby-drill policies:
"The biblical world view with respect to these issues is that we have a responsibility to manage and cultivate, harvest the natural resources that we've been blessed with to truly bless our fellow mankind."
Sighing, resigned climate scientists say to just enjoy next 20 years as much as you can
From The Onion. You know this is satire, right?
Attending a conference to discuss alarming new data on rising sea levels, a weary group of top climatologists suddenly halted their presentation Friday, let out a long sigh, and stated that the best thing anyone can do at this point is just try to enjoy the next couple decades as much as possible.